I always love late winter and then the spring time, it’s such a beautiful time of year with all the lovely spring flowers and daffodils coming out, the sun unveiling itself in full warmth. Spring is a great time of year to be making changes to your love life, so you are ready to be meeting people by the summertime. Here’s 4 ways you can spring clean your love life.
1 Make your love life a priority. Many of us put our love life off, we say things like I’ll finish my studies and then I’ll meet that guy. And after we finish studying, we can say now I need to focus on my career, I will make time to meet a partner when I get my career going. Once we have got our career going, we can say once I get that promotion I will start dating. However once you get that promotion you probably be even busier and be likely put it off again till a later date. Or, we can feel we need to lose weight and we can’t date until we have done that…
2 Make time for learning about dating and relationships. When we postpone dating we also postpone valuable learnings about dating and relationships which can help us attract a great partner. Some people know early on the type of person who is a good match for them. For others it is a trial and error process, through dating we learn what’s most important to us in a relationship. Learning what we like and what is most important to us earlier on can stand us in good stead for in our love life and attracting the person that’s right for us. So take action, go on some dates, spring is a great time to be out and about meeting people!
3 Change your Story and beliefs about dating. We all have a story about our love life we tell ourself. Some I heard recently were ‘all the best men are taken’, 'there isn't anyone as great as my ex out there' or a real goodie, ‘all the commitment minded men are gone’. These can really hold us back, because how motivated are we to get out there and meet people when we believe all the relationship minded men have already met someone else?
There are many other beliefs that prevent us meeting someone. Some people say things like ‘I never get the man I like’. Or ‘the guys I like don’t pay attention to me, they aren’t interested in me’. One of my clients said ‘the man I want isn’t out there, and even if he was I wouldn’t deserve him’ and when that belief was dealt with, she attracted her now husband into her life, they were engaged the same year and married the next year. Changing our beliefs about relationships can be the key to turning our love lives around.
4 Change your story and beliefs about relationships. And if you are in a relationship, make time to think about your relationship beliefs too. Sometime we can feel that when we meet someone everything will be right in our life. We know that the happy ever after is a fairy tale, but we want it all the same. Many people believe that once you meet someone, the relationship will make you truly happy. Your relationship and your partner, can bring a lot to your life, but neither is responsible for making you happy. The only person who is responsible for making you happy is you, you’ve got to be happy in yourself.
One of my clients was feeling unhappy and thought there was something wrong with her relationship. When we dug deeper it turned out she was a little down. So when we looked at all the things she could do to make herself better like running, yoga and reading and increased her self-care she felt a lot happier in herself and in her relationship too.
If you have been out of dating for a while, summer is a fantastic time to get back into it. Everyone is in a good mood when they see the sunshine, more open to going out and new opportunities. It's a lovely time too for romantic picnics and long strolls in the sunshine...
Enjoy the dating!