Relationships can be one of the most challenging areas of life. They can also be amazing, when we get them right. Here are 7 easy ways to improve your relationship...
1. Be kind to one another
Kindness is one of the most popular traits people look for in a partner. Everyone wants to date someone kind. And don't just be kind at the beginning of the relationship. It’s important to know that you need at least five positive interactions for every negative interaction – that’s just for your relationship to survive and be okay. If you want a great relationship, you need 10 positive interactions for every negative. Being kind is an easy thing we can do to help ensure our relationship's longevity.
2. Focus on our partners good points
Sometimes we focus more on what our partner does wrong than on what they do right. This isn’t a recipe for a happy relationship. Focusing on what’s great about your partner and why you fell in love with them in the first place helps couples stay in love. After all, everyone likes to have their good points noticed and appreciated.
3. Pay attention
Be conscious that your time with them is precious. One of the challenges today is that it’s becoming increasingly rare for people to be together and fully engaged just with each other. Couples are often paying more attention to Instagram, Twitter or WhatsApp than each other. This lack of attentiveness won’t do you any favours or make for a closer relationship. Put your phone away and give them the gift of your presence and attention.
4. Be appreciative
Thank them for all the little things they do for you. Never take what you have together for granted. A very wise man I know once said, ‘If you find love you’re incredibly privileged.’ Be grateful for their presence in your life and all that it gives you. Having gratitude is key to a happy relationship. Write down, share, and celebrate things your partner has done for the two of you.
5. Be affectionate
Touch, the physical expression of love, goes a long way. Always kiss when you say hello or goodbye, it’s a great way to connect or reconnect. Hold hands and cuddle on the sofa whenever possible. As well as being affectionate, keep your sex life alive. Send a flirty text and express your passion for each other often. Once a week is the magic number where couples report most satisfaction. Don’t feel pressured as pressure isn’t helpful but do keep that area of your life alive as much as possible. The happiest couples that are still in love after 30 plus years make the effort to be affectionate.
6. Say sorry
If you do something wrong, apologise. And when we fall out with the person we love, a great question to ask ourselves is – would I rather be right or be happy? Even if we feel we’re in the right we can still apologise for letting an argument happen.
7. Spend time together
Make time for romance and for love. It happens naturally in the beginning but later in your relationship, when you’re both busy, can be when it’s needed the most. Be creative with it. As well as flowers and romantic dinners, consider a picnic in the park or buying fish and chips and eating them by the river. Or spend an evening out at a fairground…